Hopskip

This drink is a tribute to my Cornell days, and comes with a long and storied tradition. It was developed in Risley, the Cornell performing arts dorm and my residence for all four years on campus, as a way of making extremely cheap alcohol taste palatable. It soon migrated to Cornell's Debate Team via Cornell Debate alum (and minor CDA legend) Emmanuel Schanzer, where it has gained a reputation across the Ivy League as the absolute best way to get completely sloshed on a budget. Such is its magic that even experienced drinkers will have problems knowing how much is too much. It tastes innocently like lemonade, and it packs the kind of punch that leaves unsuspecting debaters waking up in foriegn locations and searching vainly for their pants.

I stumbled across a recipe for it a few days ago, while sorting through a few of my school things. I was tourney director for the Cornell Debate Tournament for two years while I was on the team, and one of the duties involved was planning the party. Apparently I wrote down the hopskip recipe at some point for that, perhaps to remind myself to get supplies. Anyway, here's a remnant of my college days. I preserve it mostly for nostalgia's sake, as god only knows when I'll next be called upon to provide drinks for two hundred plus people. It's suitable for service at most parties, but should not be served without some sort of warning to guests, as most people drink themselves stupid the first time they encounter it. (I told you, it was invented to disguise the taste of bad booze. It does this, admirably. Perhaps too admirably as people don't realize how much they've actually consumed.)

Hopskip

1.75 liters vodka (this must be the absolute cheapest you can find. If you're paying $10 for two liters, it's too expensive)
6 cans lite beer
4 liters sprite or your local generic equivalent. Being Cornell, we used Wegmans' generic: W-up (pronounced "wup").
1/3 liter lime juice (eyeball it)
2 cans frozen concentrated pink lemonade

Find a large container and mix ingredients thoroughly. At Risley, there is an official 35-gallon tub that acts as the hopskip vessel (to be absolutely true to Risley tradition, someone's arm was the stirrer in lieu of spoon, but this is not strictly necessary). For Cornell Debate events, it is frequently served out of a trashcan, although a new bag (or two or three) is strongly recommended for this method of service. This basic recipe makes about eight liters, but can readily be doubled, trebled, or quadrupled to fit a given crowd size.

Servings: How much a single recipe serves has always been a matter of debate, and attempts at scientific tests have yielded different results based on the respective participants' alcohol tolerances. Nonetheless, eight people is a conservative estimate (and those eight people will be really drunk), while fifteen or twenty is a more likely number.